Slept really badly, and ended up doing what always makes me wake up several times during the night when B’s not home – in my sleep turning to put my arm around him and instead it hits an empty space where he should be and that’s when I wake up. Then, to add to my restless slumber, I had lots of weird dreams, most of which were quite vivid in my memory first thing this morning, but have faded now. I suppose it just goes to show that I am lost without B, not just because he is my BFF and soulmate, but physically too. I physically crave him. It’s almost a small panic when I wake from discovering his side of the bed empty. Thank God it’s only ever temporarily, although that is bad enough.
I am considering getting my British citizenship. Not that I need it, and I’m not sure I want to let go of my Swedish passport, but sometimes I just get so wound up. Last night a Facebook discussion turned rather heated, and I couldn’t stop myself getting drawn into it. Sweden’s feminist political party was the subject. Given my strong feelings on feminism, this was something I should have given a wide birth, but there you go. I find it hard to have a discussion or any type of exchange with aggressive people, and when it comes to Swedish politics there are two kinds: the far right party and the feminist party.
Both parties fuelled by anger that is aimed at a specific group. Well, you also have the green party, who all seem pretty angry too, but not to the same extent. But this seems to be Sweden today. We hate men, we hate immigrants and we hate people who drive a Mercedes. However, the greens are a little softer and a little more reasonable in their approach, so let’s stick with the far right and the feminists for now.
They are what is called ‘parties for the discontent’. End result being that people who vote for them are generally people who are angry with this, that, the other. And frighteningly, the majority of those angry people haven’t read the party manifestos. The unemployed guy who blames immigrants for his own failure to find a job only hears “we will put restrictions on immigration”, and that’s enough. The lady who is angry because a man got the job she wanted or ended up on a higher salary than her, only hears “equal salaries for all”.
Feminism is simply an ideology that I believe has completely lost its way. The whole debate around how companies, parliaments and so on should have a 50-50 gender split is just ridiculous. Like one very clued up lady pointed out in last night’s Facebook debate – you can’t focus on a 50-50 outcome, what you need is a 50-50 opportunity. I.e. everyone should be able to compete for jobs on the same conditions, but you can’t measure the outcome on anything other than merit as otherwise the best person for the job isn’t necessarily the one who got it.
It does drive me insane, to be honest, I find it so incredibly stupid.
The other lady, the one who said she would vote for the feminist party, gave as her reason for doing so “to stick a finger up to the patriarchy”. Turns out she is a business owner. If she bothered to read the manifesto, she’d soon discover that the feminist party are hostile to that segment. No, no – no matter, as long as she gets angry with the men!
What I don’t get is this – sure, historically and still prevalent in many parts of the world today, men tend to be in positions of power more so than women. But why should today’s men be punished for what came before? Certainly in Sweden, which I dare say is probably the most equal nation in the world, I really cannot see how this could be an acute issue.
The feminist party were never going to win me over as I disagree with everything they stand for, but I think the first time when I actually considered giving up my Swedish citizenship was a few years ago when the party had been given donations equivalent of roughly £10,000 from two private benefactors. And what do they do? They set it on fire, in front of an audience. Why? To point out the difference in salaries between men and women in Sweden today. A party that behaves in this way do not deserve to be taken seriously. Would that money not have been better spent on perhaps a women’s shelter?
Anyway. That’s enough of a rant. I’m sure it’s a subject I come back to as it winds me up so much.