Only one thought for today, really – how utterly lovely it is to have B’s two sons around. I was predisposed to loving them of course, but now I find myself genuinely really liking them for who they are as well as that pre-existing condition of what they are: the children of the love of my life, who I would have loved regardless only based on that and even if they’d hated me in return. They are indeed easy to like – really great kids who are brought up well and both have wonderful personalities to go with their good manners and sweet dispositions. It’s relaxing too, no forced or stilted conversations, just everyone being themselves be it sitting around each preoccupied checking their phones or laptops, talking or bantering.
I am very lucky indeed. And as much as I have at times resented B’s ex-wife and felt frustrated just like he does at what’s gone on during these seemingly never ending divorce proceedings, I do have to admit I admire her for raising these wonderful young men and I’m sure they are in many ways a reflection of their mother. There. I said it. She did that very well. And given how lovely they are towards me, I also have to credit her for not poisoning the situation, even though there have been a few situations where she has put them in a shit position. But there we are – divorce never brought out the best in anyone (at least not anyone I know, myself included), and hopefully in the new year this will all be over soon.
Today was a really great day. Breakfast with B and his two minions, then we headed into town for Bounce, a bar in Holborn with table tennis. We played doubles (old vs young), then a tournament. B’s eldest won, I came second. The little sod has a viciously good serve and in the final he afterwards told me with an apologetic and ever so cute little smile that he thought I returned his serves well, so he deliberately changed them from fast to slower in the hope that I’d fuck up.
And now I’m off to bed again with a smile on my lips as blissful as the one of last night, again hearing father and sons through the door, chatting and laughing.
My world is a really beautiful place.