Call Centres and Being Lucky

What can I say? I simply forgot! Because I slipped out of the habit of doing these morning pages (although they’re rarely MORNING pages – just DAILY pages), I just didn’t have any trigger or habit to get to it yesterday. Oh well, I’m sure this will all become routine again once I get used to being in the flow once more.

I’m so excited! I have finally managed to create a proper blueprint for the novel and given how I have so much of the actual writing done, what is now left is just fillers and shaping it all up! And with a whip firmly in place to keep me on the straight and narrow, it’s now all systems go. Not that I ever thought it’d be easy to write a book, but it’s proven so much harder than I thought it’d be. Anything from retooling a character to scouring for misplaced/missing/wrongly placed commas, it’s one hell of a task. But I’ll be damned if I don’t get it done – it’ll happen and I’ll get there even if it’s the last thing I ever do.

Today has been spent on fleshing out Alice and John, and I learnt so much about them both along the way. Not that these small details will make it into the actual novel itself, but it did me a world of good to consider things like what they might rescue in a fire. For John, it’d be a ring with the inscription ‘TCB’, and for Alice, the photo of her mother. Really useful exercise to make them both all the more real.

Funny, I still get a little surprised when I glance at my left hand, as I do when it strikes me that there’s a ring there that I’m not yet used to. It makes me giggle happily every time when I look at this perfect diamond, which is way bigger than I deserve, knowing how this is a symbol for the most amazing person there ever was wanting to make me his forever. Jeez, is it even legal to be this fortunate? Hell, I don’t care, I’m just going to keep on enjoying being me, whether I deserve all this happiness or otherwise.

And once again, it’s a Monkey week. Got my little man from school a couple of hours ago and so happy that he is here for a week again. He’s obviously ignoring me completely, only wanting to be on his Xbox playing and communicating with his mates via the little headset that makes him look like an adorable little call centre worker. B is hopefully on his way home soon, and I am so looking forward to a weekend with the two great loves of my life.

Is it weird that I’m even making MYSELF feel queasy by being so ridiculously happy? Again, I don’t f*cking care, merely pointing out that I realise I am sickeningly lucky.

Pie in the oven and the timer (the oven one!) is about to go, so I have to cut it short this time, but I’m not going to let a bad conscience get to me because at least I’m now back into writing and I know that this time – THIS TIME! – nothing will stop me.

Oh, and B just texted to say he’s leaving so best get my skates on.

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